I’ve come across the popular idiom a few times recently “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.”
It’s something people say when someone criticizes hypocritically (and perhaps blindly) others for faults or sins that they themselves are guilty of.
While idioms have their limitations I couldn’t help but think more about why stones are being thrown in the first place.
Could it be that actually living in a glass house, living in a fragile construction of reality – an illusion of security and safety, actually is a catalyst itself for throwing stones at others who if they come too close become tangible if not subtle reminders that we might be standing on shaky ground?
An observation for whatever it’s worth – secure people don’t throw stones. I haven’t researched it though I bet someone has. But experience tells me there’s a direct correlation between people with fragile worldviews or paradigms of life with stone throwing – judging or attacking others. It doesn’t always look the same but it often comes from the same place.
One one hand, passive aggressive types must protect themselves from facing the reality that they are not able to be in charge enough of their own glass house, so they judge others for their inadequacies – deflecting away from the big inadequacy staring themselves at the mirror. Passive people can be just as judgmental as any overtly and explicit angry and critical person. It’s just disguised – a form of guerrilla warfare if you will. That’s why temperament is not always a good indicator of how much anger is really inside someone.
On the other hand, the flat out aggressive types must guard themselves against the vulnerability of not being in total control of their house, so they attack – and sometimes viciously so at the mere hint that there might be something outside of their control. Theology, methodology, pedagogy – whatever, they will throw stones against anyone who potentially will remind them that they are preaching certainty from uncertain foundations.
Security and certainty are two different things. People who seek to find their security in certainty are those who put the most time into designing and constructing their glass houses so they can maintain a perceived position of superiority over their neighbor.
(And for any friends who grow anxious over this – I am not discussing the issue of absolute versus relative truth. Absolute truth exists – but much of what we seek to find comfort in as “certainty” is all too often a fragile paradigm of theology that makes us feel better about what we fear most in our lives. Glass houses are built reactively out of a survival instinct .)
When threats to our glass houses arise – we have two choices. Either we can defend it at the cost of others. I think the Bible would clearly name this as “pride.” Or we can trust our foundations and be humble enough to have some of our glass destroyed for the sake of learning and relationship.
There is a better way than protecting our glass houses – it’s called the way of love and humility. But these are two things that only really shine in our lives when we first find security as one who is deeply loved and accepted amidst limitations and hideousness.
So yes – people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. But they shouldn’t live in glass houses either.
In the Scriptures, Jesus talks about God’s provision for Him despite not having anywhere to “lay his head.” That we can be secure enough in God’s goodness and provision to not have to worry about alleviating our anxiety and fears through material gain or comforts that feel like a “certain” or “sure” thing. The Scriptures expose “the sure things” of materialism, Pharisaical theology, or the pragmatic religiosity of the Sadducees as glass houses – whose owners throw stones.
And they still throw stones today. The angry theological watchdogs, anxious and rigid leaders, the self-righteous self-anointed prophets that judge on a dime – glass houses abound today and because glass houses abound, so does stone throwing.
But how about you? How about me?
Are we building glass houses? Are we throwing stones to defend them? Or are we seeking a secure foundation that frees us to live and love with humility?
